Hey
We parted ways a year ago and I thought I've moved on but a notification on Instagram brought some old feelings back.
I'm female, 33 yo and a year ago I dated a guy I really liked. He seemed to like me too but his accomplishments intimidated me.
As a result I became very self concious, and kept waiting for a day when he will deem me to be too boring, not interesting enough, not alive enough or something else.
The guy is 14 years older, an established offshore engineer, taekwondo black belt, he does crazy physical drill for work.
When we met(through the app 🙃) I was exhausted. I have just bought a small 1 bed flat on my own, tried to make it into an Airbnb and did redecorating (removing the wallpaper, sanding, mending, painting the walls, laying the laminate). I decided to do it all myself.
I work in an office, entry position managing transport . Got a bachelors in science and tried working In a lab but it didn't workout and the money was bad.
Anyway, I haven't got any accomplishments in any sports /art or music. I've I migrated when I was 16 which messed up my education a little (my diploma was not recognised in the uk so I had to take a few extra years to catch up).
My family is quite poor and volatile. Never got on with my stepfather, there was a lot of drinking.
Now I am redecorating an English flat (nothing was done here in years and it's from the 80s),learning how to swim 😅
Also got a few part time jobs on top of my main one so feel burnt out(probably why that notification stang a little). But truly I just féel like I'm not good enough for that guy. I'm just a woman who works in the office and tries to catch up in life vs him shooting drone videos and stuff
I like to work out, eat healthy and try to work on myself regularly. Been told I'm pretty (I guess that's subjective)
If there is something resurfacing I try to inspect it in private and see where it comes from rather than thinking it's someone's fault.
I'm much better now but any advise on how you guys learn to appreciate yourself and feel good enough.
This is a second man this happened with. There was no intimacy just when his profile popped up and I read it the same feelings of being not good enough resurfaced. At some point I don't even understand why these accomplished men even looked my way
I even remembered us going up hill and how strong they were.
Any advise is appreciated 😊
Tl;dr how to stop feeling not good enough for your date?
